Just a Couple of Things

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Okay… since grieving does not necessarily always have to equal sadness and sorrow, I thought I could use a little whimsy around here today, so I figured maybe others could too.

Not only is this one of the sweetest video clips ever {seen yesterday on Ann Voskamp’s blog}. It’s also very touching to me right now…

…not to mention, it sort of makes me want to cry when I think of Izzy not having a little sister around to look out for. Mostly, though, it just makes me smile.

So many times when I look at Isaac as he’s playing around here, I think Sheesh, he would have been the BEST big brother of all time. We talk about it a lot, actually… Mr. B. and I. It’s something I’m sure I’ve mentioned here before.

We sincerely felt that he’d be a fabulous big brother since day one of finding out we were pregnant. And even after the possibility arose, we felt he’d do well as a sibling to a special-needs little girl. He’s very compassionate {a very nice trait to have in a son when you are grieving and finding yourself not quite holding it together sometimes}, and he’s also a great helper. I know I’ve also mentioned here, at least once, that the biggest reason we decided to have another child was for Isaac’s sake. So it goes without saying that we sometimes grieve for him, too… often, actually. And I just can’t help but get a little sentimental when I see the above video… or a brother/sister team anywhere.

The night before we went to the hospital to give birth, Izzy stayed with his cousins at my older sister’s house. To get there, Mr. B. would have to drive him to meet them all half-way. Just as they were on their way out, my twin sister walked through the door. I was so delighted, as she was just in the nick of time for me to grab her and ask her to do the quickest little photo shoot of myself, Anysia {still in my belly} and Isaac… before he was whisked away.


I had seen a similar photo {a thing of perfection far more beautiful than mine} in this post a few weeks earlier, and I knew right then that I really wanted to recreate that little scene with my toddler and yet-unborn baby. My sister didn’t even have a chance to remove her winter coat before I grabbed her by the arm and dragged her down the hallway to my bedroom, with camera in hand. We had to hurry so that I could release my little two-year-old model and allow his dad to get him to their destination on time.

Had we not been rushed or had I been more prepared, I like to think I would have gotten something a little closer to the aesthetic seen in the inspiration shot. But for how quickly we did it, I was happy with how it turned out. I didn’t really want to do an exact copy of the original photo, as I wanted mine to be as natural as possible. But I couldn’t help but use the same posing because I found the posing in the other shot to be so lovely. I quite loved the mood in that other photo, as well, hoping to capture a similar one for mine.

I really wanted a photo with him near my belly, close to his little sister… something tender and memorable on that last night before she would be born… our last chance to have them together that way.

It seemed like the perfect toy to grab—Anysia’s little pink monster sent by a dear friend of mine—to use for the photo, as I knew I’d be bringing that little monster with us to the hospital the next morning. In fact, it was already packed in my bag and ready to go. My hope was that if we were to get any time with her, she’d get to have her first and only stuffed toy.

I love that little monster. It’s so not something I would have picked out for my little girl. But I know Anysia would have loved little googley-eyed monsters if she had turned out wanting to be anything at all like her big brother. So it was the perfect little plush toy for a photo of my two little munchkins.


That next night, in the hospital, I was so glad my sister thought to put her {i say her because I’m assuming she’s a she… not every monster is a he, right?} up next to us for those last couple of photos taken of our baby girl. I had forgotten about her sitting there in my bag for most of the day. Though we arrived at six in the morning, she would not appear on the scene {for photos} until about nine o’clock that night.

We still have her with us. She’ll go into Anysia’s keepsake box, I think. But I haven’t decided yet. I may just want to keep her out and visible, because she really does make me smile.

Speaking of smiles, I’ve got a couple more right here…

View More: http://sherahgphotography.pass.us/anysia-bateman

View More: http://sherahgphotography.pass.us/anysia-bateman.

Photographs by Angela Heldman {first and second} and Sherah G